The saddest unspoken rule in our society is called "human affection"

2021-09-15 04:56:02  作者:Life journey

stay 《 The deep structure of Chinese culture 》 In a Book , Historian sun Longji put forward a concept :“ Adults and children ”.

What do you mean ?

Sun Longji explained , In our society , Rules are greater than individuals .

Social evaluation of people , It doesn't depend on his ability and personality , It depends on what circle he is in , With whom .

Under this cultural framework , We must be careful to maintain our relationship with the people around us , Dare not make real self-expression .

Like in front of authoritarian parents , Children can only be obedient .

This is also called by sun Longji “ Self compressed personality ”. Mr. Lu Xun is in 《 Demi-Concession Studio Essays 》 In the said :

“ The program of the Chinese spirit is ‘ face ’, Just grab this face , It's like catching Q The little braid on my head , Lead him East, just east , Take him West and go west .”

People cling to “ Favor ” This big online , Exchange resources with each other .

You bet , As a country of etiquette , Let's give each other face , This is the most normal thing .

What's more, in the acquaintance society , You're not human , It's hard to survive .

Today, you helped the neighbor pick up the children , The neighbor will get you an express tomorrow ; Today you help your friends solve problems , Tomorrow, a friend will say a good word for you ...... so to speak ,“ Favor ” It's a gear , Maintaining the smooth operation of society .

Just like Fei Xiaotong in 《 Earthbound China 》 Mentioned in :

Each family draws a circle centered on itself , The neighbors and relatives around are all part of the circle , Everyone helps each other in their own circles .

can “ Favor ” Once it infiltrates the power system , It is destined to cause uncontrollable consequences .

The consolation is , With the progress of the times , Those who are willing to abide by the law are no longer a minority , They grew up , Become the backbone of social change .

More and more young people , No longer indulge in superficial harmony , But the courage to break the peace , To express their demands .

Being deducted by the company , They won't “ The tail from wagging the dog ”, But bravely defend their rights through legal means ;

Sexually harassed by superiors , They won't swallow it , Not afraid to hurt the harmony , It's about bringing the bad guys to justice .

Modern society has entered “ Atomization ” Stage , A large number of young people poured into the first and second tier cities , In the same strange environment , No one knows anyone , That kind of relationship in the past 、 Human soil , Has begun to tear .

What's more? , They are well aware of , Catering and integration , It's not becoming mature , But in a sense “ Self destruction ”.

To borrow Fromm's words :

“ Everyone has only one career in his life : Be himself .”

Try to be yourself , With their own unique rationality and love , To get happiness .

Slowly, , You will feel , This is the taste of living .2021 Years. , We have such a chance , To shape a new voice .

The world and I love you .

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